HE SAID... Tony Walker is running for President!!!!!

TONY WALKER

This week's He Said is more like a He's Bitching.

A very good friend of mine is down on her luck. She's fighting with someone close to her, her house is in foreclosure, & she just had her hours cut at her job. She also lost all her benefits there with the cuts.
 

This makes me mad. Real mad. I personally believe every citizen of our great Country is entitled to medical benefits. I personally think it's a disgrace that this country profits from our illnesses. I am disgusted about this financial depression we're in.

Why are we in this depression? What companies are hurting? The oil companies aren't! The "Verigreedy" bastards who threw me aside because I have one leg aren't hurting! They're all making record profits while most of us live paycheck to paycheck!!

My friend has worked her ass off for years. She's never been in any trouble. She's a kind, hard working, tax paying citizen. These kind of things should not be happening to these kind of people!! Yet it's happening all over.

Why bother working if there are no benefits? No retirement packages? Let's all sit home & collect unemployment or disability.... they come with some benefits. You can get money for sitting at home all day reading Facebook statuses!

People wanna work. People wanna put pride into what they do. There's nothing wrong with being rewarded for that. Rewarded with good pay & benefits for you & your family!!!

I say it's time for a do over!! No more Republicans! No more Democrats!! NO MORE POLITICIANS!! Time for people who truly care to lead this Country back to greatness!!!

Tony Walker is running for President!!!!!

HE SAID... DING DONG, WTF?!?!

TONY WALKER
I need to vent about a recent "What the @#$%" moment.
This past Sunday morning at 4:44AM my doorbell rang.

Immediately Lisa & I wake up & think something's wrong. All the classic Lifetime Channel moments are in place-a quiet moment, doorbell rings, dog barks, scared children, etc.
Of course I jump out of bed but there is nothing I can do since I can't walk... (no, people with prosthetics do not sleep with their legs on).... so it's up to Lisa.

She looks through the glass in the middle of the door. She sees a man, late teens/early twenties, bent over like a baseball player in "ready position." She's convinced this man is getting ready to bust in. She yells for me to call the cops.
Lisa then screams, "What do you want?!"
The man yells, "I found a dog. Is it yours or do you know who it belongs to?"
"NO"
"OK. Sorry to bother you."

Turns out the guy was in that position because he was bent over holding the dog by his collar.
I look out the window & watch the man & the dog walk away. I hung up the phone.
While it's possible this guy was looking to do something criminal, I believe he was just a moron who rang someone's bell at 4:44 in the morning.

In this world of cell phones, why not just call the cops & let them handle the dog?
Why not take the dog home & throw him/her in your backyard until waking hours?
WTF?!
Thanks for scaring the shit out of my kids.
Thanks for scaring the shit out of my wife. She couldn't sleep the rest of the morning.
Jackass!!!

What would you have done if you found a dog in the middle of the night?
Would you knock on someone's door?

WANNA LAUGH?!?!

Tony Walker

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."

She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"

A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!

HE SAID.... Ladies I have one word for you...

FART!
Tony Walker

I'm a guy. I fart. I fart a lot. I fart all the time.
What's wrong with that??
I can understand not liking the smell. But sometimes there is no smell & almost every time the smell is gone in 2 seconds!
How the hell do you women hold those damn things in? How have you not exploded by now??? There must be some crazy noises going on in the ladies room!!
But here's my thing.... it's a natural function. I do it, you do it, he does it, she does it, even dogs do it. So what?
I admit I am like a 5 year old when it comes to farting. I laugh hysterically at all the crazy noises our asses make. It never gets old either. I've had farting fests with my friends!
Personally I admire a woman who can fart in front of us guys. That means she is comfortable enough around us to do it.
It's symbolic of our close friendship!!
So what's the big deal about farting???

YOUR PRESIDENT, HE SAID...

Tony Walker
Since I will be the next President of The United States, from now on my He Said's will be Your President, He Said.
As your President I will legalize prostitution.
Have you ever thought about why prostitution is illegal??
Sure some of you think it's disgusting. Some of you think it's bad for health reasons. Some of you think men who cheat with prostitutes should be tortured.
I am not arguing any of those points. But are those reasons why it should be illegal??

Why should we deny the right for a man or woman to get laid???
Everybody wants some! I want some too!!!
If that's the easiest (or only) way someone can get some love, shouldn't they be allowed?
If it's legal, the places it occurs may improve. The prostitutes may be healthier women if it's legal.
If someone is doing it behind their spouses back, you're on your own. This President ain't touchin that!
Sex sells.... spending money & regulating legal sex would improve spending, pay taxes, create jobs, etc. This could be a major boost for our floundering economy!!
What do you think? Should prostitution be legal?