NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

If exercise is so much fun, why is it called "working out?"

Fitness rhymes with witless. Coincidence?

If you eat pizza in the forest and no one sees you, do the calories still count?

Cast out your fat demon: have your own exercise-ism.

If God wanted me skinny, why did he invent stretch pants?

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

If exercise is so much fun, why is it called "working out?"

Fitness rhymes with witless. Coincidence?

If you eat pizza in the forest and no one sees you, do the calories still count?

Cast out your fat demon: have your own exercise-ism.

If God wanted me skinny, why did he invent stretch pants?

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

It's not the pants that make you look fat. It's the extra 20 pounds on your behind.

Running burns calories. Running your mouth burns friends.

Having a hobby is a stress reliever. unless your hobby is cheesecake.

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

The West Coast Diet: Dude, eat tofu and sprouts. Folllowed with overpriced mineral water.

The Movie Theater Diet: Don't be silly. You can't afford food at a movie theater.

The Guy Diet; Eat lots of spicy, fried food with beer. Chase with antacids.

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

Pear shape or apple shape? Or just regular sausage shape?

When the chips are down, you can't eat the dip.

If your pants are the same size as a regular sleeping bag, you don't need the s'mores.

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

The Amusement Park Diet: Eat hot dogs, cotton candy and soda pop. Ride a roller coaster. The hot dogs, cotton candy and soda pop will be right back.

The Child Diet: Eat taco shells, marshmallow creme and candy. Complain of a tummy ache.

The House work Diet: "Dust" powdered sugar onto donuts, the "vacuum" them into your mouth.

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

Chromium, copper, iron, magnesium: if you take all those supplements, you'll set off the metal detector at the airport.

If the counter guy offers you fries with that, it's rude to refuse.

It's not overeating. its stockpiling calories.

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

The Female Diet: Eat chocolate. Drink diet soda. Buy a workout video.

The Empty Nest Diet: Eat frozen dinners in front of the TV. Enjoy yourself immensely.

The Kid-Away-at- College Diet: Eat macaroni and cheese. A LOT!

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

Catholic calistenics: sit, kneel, stand, sit kneel ,stand.

The Thrift Store Diet: Shop at the day-old bakery.

The  New Age Diet: Eat carrot sticks. Visualize pizza.

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

Women are like wine. As the age, they become more robust and full-bodied.

I still have everything I had when I was 17. it's just 18 inches lower.

Is wrestling with my conscience considered weight lifting?

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

Whenever possible , leave the car at home and walk. You'll most certainly cut back on your errands.

Make a deal with your spouse. He doesn't comment on your waist line. You don't comment on his hairline.

Exercise... the poor person's plastic surgery.

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

How come being a nutritionist is all about NOT eating stuff?

For every pastry you eat, there is a bunch of broccoli that will live.

If we're not supposed to gain weight, how come skin is elastic?

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

You can cheat on your boyfriend or girlfriend but not on your workout.  ~Author Unknown

Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes.

If stress burned fat, we'd all be a size 3!

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY
Patty B

Do you call a person who has abandoned their diet a "dessert-er"?

A great way to lose weight is to eat while you are naked and standing in front of a mirror.  

Restaurants will always throw you out before you can eat too much.

Join an exercise class . Misery loves company!

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

If exercise is so much fun, why is it called "working out?"

If you eat pizza in the forest and no one sees you, do the calories till count?

Drinking lots of water is suppose to help you lose weight. You'll burn fat just running to the bathroom all day long.

NO PAIN NO GAIN

THOUGHTS FOR THE DAY

Patty B

When it comes to dieting, my will power is great. it's my won't power that needs help.

I burn all the calories I need by being annoyed with all the new diet trends out there.

Walking is great cardiovascular exercise. Walking to the donut shop may not be so great.