Friday, June 15, 2012


I wouldn't dream of stepping on Jillian's stilettos, but the term "mommy porn" in Tony's He Said, got my wheels turning too. I haven't read any of the Fifty Shades trilogy except for a few excerpts and was less than impressed with the writing. I never got to the kinky scenes which seem to be behind the books enormous popularity. I just don't understand why this is news and has brought about this term "mommy porn." Erotica has been around for a long time, anyone remember Anais Nin anymore? How about "the Story of O" or "Nine and a Half Weeks." It's not new. There's a long history of women reading and writing erotica. Some of us are really into it. This is a secret?

What about all those romance novels out there? The ones with the shirtless muscular men and women is various stages of undress. Those don't end with a chaste kiss like a Jane Austen novel. How many of us read "Forever" by Judy Blume? Let me rephrase that, how many us of just read that part of "Forever?" I don't think I even had kissed a boy when I read it. Yet I related to the longing, the fear of someone being more sexually experienced, and whether sex is a physical act or a romantic act. I wanted it to be both.

What makes erotica different from porn? Simple, there are characters. Maybe not always well-written or believable ones (Christian Grey, I'm looking at you), but actually characters with names and personalities. They have (gasp) feelings and ideas. There is a plot. Most porn is mainly directed at men. There is no plot, no character development. Many times the women are degraded, nameless fantasy f*ck dolls come to life. The woman is an object, there to service a man or men. There are no thoughts in her head and no one would care if there was. Sometimes it crosses over into violence. How would that be a turn on?

Sex can be kinky, it can push boundaries. Yet you have to feel safe within that situation. There is sex and there is romance which can include sex. Women, not just mommies, embrace their sexuality. Perhaps, these novels are letting them know they are not alone.

It's not news to me.

- The Good Girl


  1. I love this post! Glad you are back at DRL, Good Girl! Hope to see more soon!

  2. Women have been involved in embracing their sexuality for as long as there has been sex. Well aware that feelings can make and break it. Apparently, it's only "news" to the men in the world.

  3. Anonymous you can't be serious!
    Are the men the ones carrying on about this book? Nope!
    It's women telling each other to read it!!!
    Us guys have been trying to get you ladies to embrace your sexuality with us for years!!!
    In fact, I'd like to see Jillian or The Good Girl come embrace it with me right now!!!

  4. Embracing your sexuality can be difficult for some women, even with encouragement from a partner. We are bombarded with messages that tell us we're not thin enough, pretty enough, not worthy. In erotica, we find a world that doesn't judge, that let's our fantasies be "real."

  5. Glad to be back, Jillian! Hope to see more of you as well!

  6. Excellent post! Great to have you hanging at the lounge again Good Girl. Hope to read more of you!

    Everything has it's place and it's all about your personal comfort zone and connection - fantasy & reality - if you are lucky somewhere in between you create the best of both worlds.

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