*Revised at 11am, with the addition of "Jenn Said"
HE SAID... Tony Walker
Let me start this one off by saying that I am not trying to piss anyone off with this post. I seriously need to hear from you guys to educate me!
This past weekend I got into some trouble. I run a comedy troupe with a business partner who is a female. She is one of my closest friends. At every show we do I like to take pictures & video then post them on all the usual sites. This past Friday we did a show & there was a picture from it showing two cast members and a bunch of audience members. The audience members were laughing, so I said to myself, "Self, this is a good picture to post because people will see us having a good time." What I failed to notice was that one of the cast members in the photo, a female cast member, had her back to the camera so her ass is in the shot.
Well this cast member freaked. "GET THIS PICTURE OFF FACEBOOK IMMEDIATELY!!" Me being the moron that I am had no clue what her problem was. My business partner had to yell at me like my mother used to when I didn't clean my room. "Maybe you don't get it because you're a guy," was one thing she said a few times. You know what? She's right. I don't get it.
What is with women & the whole "I look fat" thing? In my experience just about every woman I've heard say that is nothing close to fat. The woman in my story is nowhere near fat. The other comment is always, "My ass looks so big." Are we looking at the same ass?? Am I the real life Shallow Hal?? Sorry ladies but I just don't see what the hell you are talking about!! If you're a woman & you've met me chances are I've studied your ass. You look fine!!!
Help me out here. Comment below & tell me what's going on.
And yes.... I did take the picture off Facebook.
SHE SAID... Via the Ladies of the Lounge Dawn Said... There is a code of law when posting a picture of another on Facebook....you MUST get clearance from the person in the picture prior to it going up AND..NEVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES tag someone...share the picture privately and allow them to tag if they choose. I would like to put this on the record....no one ever better post a picture of my ass anywhere.. thank you :)
Very recently feeling more comfortable in my own skin then I have in years - I'm still not ready to have pictures of my far side paraded anywhere. When you are overweight it's out of the question. When you slim down - it takes a while for your mind to catch up with the mirror. if you are blest enough to have dwelled happily in between, there are still issues. Most women don't see themselves clearly or through the often less condemning, eyes of man. It is easy to be overly critical and lose rationale when it comes to our bodies. The media bombards us with picture "photoshop" perfect women. It's hard to measure up to that literally unreal standard. Yet many women feel inadequate or fat if they don't. Ninety something pounds later - I've learned it's not about the weight or the food, it's about how you feel. Confidence comes from within. You have to foster it in yourself. We all have areas that we'd like to improve - so strive to be healthy and feel better. Don't beat yourself up in the meantime. Tony... If we are going to try not to beat ourselves up - you certainly can't put salt on the wounds! Posting pics without prior approval is an easy invitation to trouble.
There is an absolute dilemma when it comes to the derriere. A woman will ask you, "Honey does this make my butt look big?", but we all no there is no safe answer to that question. Apart from a lucky few - photography flatters not the fanny. Although we ladies strive to be admired and noticed, dare I suggest even, desire a complement about having a "Hot a$$", not many a female would fancy their rear assets "up in lights" on the social media sites. Study all you want, Tony, (without making an a$$ of yourself, of course) - but steer clear of the freeze frame photography! That said...... flattery just might get you somewhere.... positive and polite is the way to go, it's a fine line - BEWARE of how you walk it! Don't be a "guy"! Be a gentleman!
Women have been trained from birth to worry about how they look, what they wear, how they smell! Just look at ads and commercials. Men can skip shaving, grow a pot belly and go bald but if a woman puts on 5 pounds, it's grounds for a man to have an affair! If a man goes around in a ripped tshirt, flip flops and messy hair, he's "casual". If a woman does it, she's a slob. That's just the way society sets the bar. And since you state that if a woman has met you, you've already checked out her "posterior", you're one of the ones who make women self conscious about having it plastered on a Facebook page. Sorry Tony, but you're such a man!!!!!
*Jenn Said... I agree with Tony !!! Unless her butt looked bad .. I don't think anyone has that kind of time to be policing pics. Facebook is meant to fun and interesting . Would everyone be on it all the time , If every picture looked perfect ... I know I would be bored !!! I post a lot of pictures and from time to time have been asked to take someones down ... Never yelled at though!!! So, I take it down and move on . Everyone has their own comfort level!! I respect that. A bad picture of me, reminds me either to go get my hair done, go to the gym, or never leave the house without makeup !! That's me though.......
LADIES....... Now it's your turn!
Kindly comment. Tony asked for our help, please advise!