Thursday, June 21, 2012

THIS PARTY BITES

DRL welcomes Mrs. Patty Smukall, Zoologist, Teacher, and now, Party Planner!


Patty Smukall

Yes, it was a birthday party, and yes, it was all about SHARKS!

While teaching Marine Biology at a local Middle School, I was approached by the parents of one of my students. She asked me if I would organize and run a birthday party for her daughter and several of her friends. Her daughter loved our classes so much, she wanted a “shark” party. After finding out what the girl had in mind, I was happy to oblige.

The party took place in my school Science lab in the evening. I decorated the room with netting, hanging fish, and of course, a giant paper machete shark. The back table was covered in a sea-blue cloth with shark paper goods and a shark centerpiece. I even redid my bulletin boards to reflect the theme.

For food , we had “shark bites” (chicken fingers) with BBQ sauce,  blue jello mold with gummy sharks swimming in it, foot and hand shaped biscuits with a ‘bite” taken out of them, and assorted dips with taco chips ( chips were placed in dip sticking up like a shark fin.) For dessert, I made shark cupcakes using regular cupcakes and twinkies. They looked amazing, if I say so myself!

 And now the reason why this mom asked me, the science teacher, to handle this party. The party activity the student chose was dissecting sharks! That’s right – DISECTING sharks. We spend part of the evening studying sharks and their habits. We then dissected. The girls were thrilled. I had a lab coat for each child ( courtesy of the student’s mom) with their name on the pocket “Dr._______”  .  I issued them protective glasses and latex gloves. They had the time of their lives, and I did too!

After dissecting, what better thing to do than eat?We had a feast and watched them movie “Jaws”. We all slept in sleeping bags and I projected images of the sea with all kinds of sea life on the ceiling. We fell asleep to the sounds of my “oceans” meditation tape. In the morning, we were up early and the mom made us shark shaped pancakes for breakfast. Each student got a goodie bucket of “shark bait” which included gummy sharks, a sharks tooth necklace, a small stuffed shark bean bag toy and shark shaped cookies.

 The student and her mother were thrilled. The guests had a fabulous time and I felt it was a great success. I guess it must have been ,because since then I’ve had several requests for parties, including a sea turtle party, dolphin party, clown fish party, Octopus party  and more. I guess if the economy keeps going on the way it is , I can always fall back on this as my 2nd career!

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

SERGEANT STUBBY


Marion Pellicano Ambrose

While visiting a friend today, she told me about a TV show she had seen, which documented  the life  of a very unusual dog named Stubby. After hearing a little a bit about the show, I felt I wanted to learn the whole story for myself. I read several articles, watched some  videos and checked the web for everything I could find. So here is the story of  Stubby, WWI Veteran and Hero!

 Stubby was a stray Pit Bull Terrier who was abandoned in New Haven, Connecticut during the time of World War I. He was a homeless, stray living out of garbage cans. One fateful day, he wandered on to the parade ground of the Yale University campus. At that exact time, the 102nd Regiment, 26th Infantry Division happened to be training to be deployed. A soldier named John Robert Conroy, took pity on the pathetic little dog and named him “Stubby” because of his stubby little tail. Conroy started leaving food and water for the dog and let him sleep in the barracks on occasion. Stubby’s winning personality and great intelligence soon endeared him to all the other soldiers. This dog was so smart that he learned the bugle calls, learned to march in formation with the men and believe it or not, learned to salute superior officers by raising his forepaw to his brow.

Stubby truly became “one of the men” and when it came time for the 102nd to ship out, Stubby was conveniently stuffed in Conroy’s coat and smuggled onto the ship headed for France and the War. Once at sea, Stubby was allowed on deck and the sailors also fell in love with him. The machinists’ mate made him asset of his own dog tags.

Eventually, Conroy’s commanding officer caught wind of the dog aboard. When confronted, Conroy gave the command: “Present Arms!”  Stubby saluted the officer who immediately gave his blessing for Stubby to stay with the 26th, even into battle.  Stubby became the official mascot of the American Expeditionary Force and gave support and encouragement to each of the homesick soldiers on the front lines.

During his tour of duty, Stubby participated in 17 battles and 4 major offensives. In 1918 he was wounded in action and almost died, in a chemical weapons attack where the Germans launched mustard gas. But Stubby was too tough to let a little gas get him, and because of his experience, he became a “mustard gas detection dog”, letting the men know there was gas before it got to a lethal level. He would warn the men to put on their gas masks by running up and down the line, barking and nipping until they put on their masks. His actions saved countless lives this way.

Stubby was also able to detect artillery fire before the shells started exploding. This also saved many lives, as Stubby could sense German ground attacks before the men. They said he could sniff bratwurst coming from miles away and would warn the sentry by barking or even biting him until he would sound the alarm.

  Stubby spent much of his free time looking for wounded and dying Allied soldiers to rescue. According to first-hand accounts, this dog could hear English being spoken and he'd immediately run over and check out the wounded man. If the wounded man was able to walk, Stubby would lead him back to friendly lines. If the soldier was too wounded to move, Stubby would stand there and bark until a medic arrived.

Stubby the War Dog was wounded again in combat in April 1918, when he was hit with a German hand grenade while participating in the assault on the German town of Schieprey. Despite receiving shrapnel wounds to his forelimbs and chest, Stubby survived the grenade blast, lived through some emergency surgery, and spent his convalescence time cheering up the wounded men in the field hospital. He returned to action a few months later and helped participate in the liberation of Chateau Thierry, a deed that impressed the  French ladies living in the city so much that they made him a chamois blanked decorated with the flags of the Allied countries to thank him. The men of the 102nd, for their part, made Stubby a jacket designed to look like an American military uniform, and then they decorated it with Stubby's name, rank, and medals – medals that included the Purple Heart, the Republic of France Grande War Medal, the Medal of Verdun, and medals for every campaign in which he'd served.

But this thing wasn't done yet. While serving in the Argonne Forest during the Meuse-Argonne campaign of September 1918, Stubby was patrolling the trenches when he discovered a camouflaged German spy hiding out mapping the Allied trenches. Stubby must have smelled the bratwurst on this man or something, becaude he started barking and circling the soldier,  the spy made a run for it but Stubby chased and took him down. Stubby bit the spy in the rear causing him to curse spontaneously, and in German. He held the spy down until the Americans could take him into custody. For his bravery and diligence, Stubby was promoted to the rank of Sergeant, which meant that the dog now outranked his owner, who was only a Corporal at this time. Stubby became the first dog to be promoted to a rank the army. When the Americans brought the German spy back to camp they stripped the prisoner of his Iron Cross and pinned the German military medal on the dog's jacket instead.


After the war, Sergeant Stubby was smuggled back to the states, where he was an instant celebrity. He was inducted into the American Legion, offered free food for life from the YMCA, and whenever he went out of war bonds promotion tours five-star hotels would relax their "no dogs allowed" policy for the canine war hero. He went to the White House twice, met three presidents, and in 1921 the American overall commander "Black Jack" Pershing personally pinned a one-of-a-kind "Dog Hero Gold Medal" on Stubby's military jacket.

When Robert Conroy ended up attending Georgetown University for law school after the war, Sergeant Stubby went with him. The dog immediately became the official mascot of the football team – and to this day the University sports mascot is still a dog . In addition to hanging out with the players, it eventually became tradition to bring Sergeant Stubby out on the field during Halftime of football games and he'd pump the crowd up by running around the field pushing the ball around with his nose. Nobody had really done anything like this before, meaning that, Sergeant Stubby might have possibly invented the Halftime Show.

Sergeant Stubby, American war hero dog, died in 1926, at the (approximate) age of ten. Stubby was preserved and is displayed in his own exhibit at the Smithsonian's Museum of American History.

And that’s the story of a true American World War I Hero – Sergeant Stubby.

NOTHING VENTURED, NOTHING GAINED

Barbara Ward-Finneran
You never know for certain if trying something new will work out better then what you did prior to the new.  However if you never try something different, if you aren't willing to take a risk, you will certainly never find out.  It involves taking a leap of faith without being certain where you will land.  Or if you will even land on your feet.  In fact there's a good chance you could land on you ass.  Even then, from your bottom the best place to look from there is up.  Perhaps the hardest part is leaving your comfort zone.  That safe place where you have abided... sometimes for far too long.  Does the action of a calculated risk mean you've relinquished some sanity?  Who in their right mind leaves a job in this time of economic hardship to venture out into the unknown?  Naysayers will tell you to stay where you are and wait for a better time or place.  Wait to be really ready. My argument is, that that time may never come.  Perhaps we have to be brave enough to create the time and place. You are never going to be ready. However you can be fearless enough to ignore all that you hear except the voice in your heart that beats in time with the dream.  

Changing course and plotting a new path can be something dangerous to your stability and risky to life as you know it.  Yet, isn't the biggest risk challenging yourself to rise to the occasion?  Sure failure can result, but isn't the biggest failure not trying at all. Accept the fact that what you do could have negative repercussions and bravely move forward knowing that lessons learned will make it all worthwhile.  The "education" of the process will make you better and "smarter" then you are at this very moment. One you convince yourself that the risk is worth the gain,  it'll be easier to listen you your heart say "go for it", even when the mind wants to retreat and remind you that "you have no idea of what you are doing or all this will entail".  
The best ventures need to involve - not necessarily equal parts of passion, sense, dream, apprehension and adventure.  Taking a risk is dangerous, courageous, and maybe even preposterous.  It is also to be celebrated!  Even it terrifies you.  If you aren't at least a little bit scared then you probably aren't vested enough in the desired outcome.  A risk taker must be willing to bet the highest stakes on themselves. Be willing to work hard and put yourself out there... out of the box and out of your comfort zone. Be willing to go BIG or go home.  Willing to close your eyes and make a wish.  Vow all the blood, sweat and tears needed to make it work and take a leap of faith.  I do believe I'm there....
GERONIMOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

PARANORMAL PUB: Heartbeat Bridge


There's nothing like a good old summer spooky story being told around the campfire, during an evening bonfire at the beach, or even on the porch after dark. This story is said to have taken place near Heartbeat Bridge, located in Ellicot City, MD. This tale is told by people living in the area to explain why, to this day, a heartbeat can be felt through the pavement by people standing on the bridge. 
 -Marion Pellicano Ambrose


Something was going on. Jason felt it in his bones. Polly was too happy, too cheerful. No woman could be that upbeat and still be faithful to her husband. Jason sat down to a delicious, warm meal every night, and Polly sang to herself as she washed up. What kind of woman could be cheerful doing dishes? Try as he might, Jason never heard anything that hinted of a secret romance. It drove him crazy. Life was not this perfect.
Maybe Polly was seeing the milkman, or the grocer. Jason started getting up early in order to see who it was that delivered the milk. Much to his disappointment, the fellow looked as if he’d been born several centuries ago. Then Jason started doing the food shopping, and checked out every single male employee in the local grocery store. They were either antediluvian relicts—like the milkman—or still in diapers.
Later that month Jason was over at his father-in-law’s house working in the garage when he over heard his father-in-law call to Hank…Polly’s high-school boyfriend. Now he knew! He knew why Polly was so happy all the time. Her parents must have told her that Hank was coming home, and she was planning on running off with him.
Enraged with jealousy, Jason was waiting in the kitchen when Polly got back from church. He was beyond reason. He snatched up a newly sharpened steak knife, howling: “You’ve cut out my heart, now I’ll cut out yours!” Jason leapt around the table and ripped Polly’s still-beating heart out of her chest. Blood streaming everywhere, he sailed out the back door into the dark night and flung her heart, still thumping, over the side of the bridge that spanned the creek next to their home


Jason cleaned up the blood-stained house with extreme care and buried Polly’s body deep in the woods outside of town. Then he wrote several letters, carefully mimicking Polly’s handwriting, and mailed them to himself and her parents. Within a few days, everyone in town believed that Polly had been secretly seeing a man from the next town and that they had run away together.
Late one evening, he went out to the bridge to gloat in triumph over his unfaithful wife. Polly had gotten what she deserved, he thought. As he stood staring down at the water, he became aware of a vibration under his feet. Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum. It floated softly through the air, a simple rhythmic thudding. Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum. Jason’s hands began to tingle as he recognized the soft thudding sound. It was the same beat he had felt when he held Polly’s bleeding heart in his hands. Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum.
The heartbeat rang in his ears, thundering so loud that he was afraid it would wake the neighbors. Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum. Jason clapped his hands over his ears and ran back to the house. But he could not escape the terrible sound: Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum. Even the floorboards seemed to vibrate to the slow, steady rhythm. Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum. It sounded like a heart-beat. Polly’s heartbeat. Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum.
Jason screamed in terror and flung himself out of the house, running toward the bridge as the heartbeat grew louder and louder in his ears. Jason leaned over the railing.
“Curse you, Polly!” he shouted.
Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum.
With a wild shriek, Jason flung himself headfirst off the bridge like a diver, and was smashed to death on the rocks below.
Underfoot on the bridge, the pavement still vibrates to the beat of a dead heart. For now and always.
Da-dum. Da-dum. Da-dum.
 

Excerpted from Spooky Maryland by S.E. Schlosser

Monday, June 18, 2012

REVOKE MY LICENSE PLEASE!



Barbara Ward-Finneran
Never thought I'd joke about that after last year's fiasco of having my license suspended do to a clerical error with the hyphen in my name.  It was so NOT funny.  But I'm not talking about my drivers license.  I'd like to request that my "responsible adult" license be revoked?!  PLEASE!  For a few days, a day, a hour. In a way that is more effective then playing ostrich with your head in the sand.  Or running away to an evening of GNO with adult beverages and or desserts. Or having a date night in a child free zone.  Or spending a little time in some sort of fantasyland that you fancy.  All effective in their own ways - but none of those good times make "it" go away!  You get stolen moments of forgetting the world and it's realities.  Fleeting occasions to escape what overwhelms you, but cannot be ignored.  At least not for any real length of time with out things coming crashing down. As a responsible adult it is our job to prevent those crashes in all arenas of our life.  At all costs. At times even at your own expense.  


Yes, I am having one of those, "Make it Stop" evenings.  It'll pass... it always does.  I'm certain I'll be back to "Soul Food" and my "Miss Mary Sunshine" in no time at all...


However in the meantime, I'm going to say, ARGGGGGGG!  And, additionally give myself permission to have a cup of something cold and creamy from the freezer and drown my sorrows with some Hershey's syrup.  I call it "something" because I only keep the type of dairy desert in the house that doesn't constantly scream my name.  Only the decadence of certain name brands get the respect being ice creams that are worth the calories.  I will however compose enough control to not drive to Seven Eleven and purchase a pint to polish off in a single sitting.  Yes, I know it won't fix a damned thing.  I also know I'm having a moment and not an relapse of an emotional eating disaster.  I can allow myself a moment.  I can even allow myself a good cry if needed. I know it'll all be okay.  If not tomorrow, then soon.  As for tomorrow... I'll catch you then, after I go have my moment.  Since my license can't be revoked, and reality will be there in the morning, I'll settle for a fleeting moment.  After all, I'm positive, that they don't make "it" all go away - but they certainly give us time to regroup. Embrace whatever momentary escapes you can when you can! Whipped cream anyone???

Sunday, June 17, 2012

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

 
BLESSINGS TO ALL THE FATHERS... 
To all the men who know being a Daddy is about love and actions.  It's about hanging the moon and stars and being an everyday unsung hero for all the right reasons. 
KUDOS TO YOU ALL!

Friday, June 15, 2012

EROTICA ANYONE?!?!

I wouldn't dream of stepping on Jillian's stilettos, but the term "mommy porn" in Tony's He Said, got my wheels turning too. I haven't read any of the Fifty Shades trilogy except for a few excerpts and was less than impressed with the writing. I never got to the kinky scenes which seem to be behind the books enormous popularity. I just don't understand why this is news and has brought about this term "mommy porn." Erotica has been around for a long time, anyone remember Anais Nin anymore? How about "the Story of O" or "Nine and a Half Weeks." It's not new. There's a long history of women reading and writing erotica. Some of us are really into it. This is a secret?

What about all those romance novels out there? The ones with the shirtless muscular men and women is various stages of undress. Those don't end with a chaste kiss like a Jane Austen novel. How many of us read "Forever" by Judy Blume? Let me rephrase that, how many us of just read that part of "Forever?" I don't think I even had kissed a boy when I read it. Yet I related to the longing, the fear of someone being more sexually experienced, and whether sex is a physical act or a romantic act. I wanted it to be both.

What makes erotica different from porn? Simple, there are characters. Maybe not always well-written or believable ones (Christian Grey, I'm looking at you), but actually characters with names and personalities. They have (gasp) feelings and ideas. There is a plot. Most porn is mainly directed at men. There is no plot, no character development. Many times the women are degraded, nameless fantasy f*ck dolls come to life. The woman is an object, there to service a man or men. There are no thoughts in her head and no one would care if there was. Sometimes it crosses over into violence. How would that be a turn on?

Sex can be kinky, it can push boundaries. Yet you have to feel safe within that situation. There is sex and there is romance which can include sex. Women, not just mommies, embrace their sexuality. Perhaps, these novels are letting them know they are not alone.

It's not news to me.

- The Good Girl

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

SHE SAID... "MOMMY PORN", SERIOUSLY???

Jillian B. Hart
HMMMMMM...... "Mommy Porn",  REALLY? Is that what you (and or "they") are calling it, Tony?  At least that's what I read in your latest "He Said". 
Let me think of what I want to say here... I'll be back...


Friday June 16, 2012
Alright --- Truth be told - Life got in the way, as usual my return took way longer then anticipated.  With a little luck it makes you miss me more...  


Where was I?!



"Mommy Porn", Seriously.  That emanates a bit like a backhanded compliment.  Kinda like MILF, it all depends on the way you say it and rarely coming across with the right je ne sais quoi.  
(Although occasionally can make one blush in all the right ways and can be complimentary.) There is a difference between porn and erotica and that's the thing that guys often miss.  There's absolutely nothing wrong with the right dash of erotica.  However all too often the man in your life suffers from ADD...  bringing home "Another Disastrous DVD"! Come on now! There is a difference, a big difference (and yes size matters! ...Sorry could help myself!) between erotica and porn... any porn.  


I'm always up for an evening or any other time of day that has wild sparks that ignite to uncontrollable flames. Erotica builds that fire.  It creates connection.  I'll watch, listen, read --- Hell, I write my own and enjoy it.  Most of us hunger for that connection.  Therein lies the difference - the disconnect vs. the connection.  Not that there isn't positives to be found from a mind blowing f*ck... but for the long term - connections and emotions count.  Many women don't "connect" to porn. Yet erotica has emotion and connection.  That's what gets our engines racing. If you get your woman all revved up before the flag I guarantee that the final finish will be fabulous! Isn't that the point of watching and or reading something spicy together? To whet you appetite in the fantasy for the real thing. To bring fantasy into your reality! No matter how good a girl you are if you want fireworks  "in the bedroom", if you like your reality with a healthy serving of fantasyland on the side, ALWAYS pack at least a little NAUGHTY WITH YOUR NICE!  Sometime the more the better. Erotica of any kind can help take your "lady" there. If you do that - winners all around. The more you win, the more you want to play. 


I was really prepared to get into quite a bit if a rant here... (Oh, wait I did, a little one, LOL), until I got a message from one of my "besties", The Good Girl.  She took the words right out of my mouth.  So I'll stop now and let her go strutting in my stilettos.  


I'll catch ya on the next one, Tony baby! Ha! I'll give you a great big rant then... hehehehe ;)

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

HE SAID... MOMMY PORN

Tony Walker
What's with this 50 Shades Of Gray $hit?
I haven't read the book, or books, whatever it is.... but everyone says it's "Mommy porn." A term I hate by the way.
What makes the "porn" in this book more acceptable than actual porn?
Why is it ok for this book to be "mommy porn" but the videos I watch on YouPorn frowned upon?
Have you ladies been into porn all this time? If so why don't you sit & watch some with your man? Your man would LOVE IT!!! Some of you may even convince your man to watch "He's Just Not That Into You" & all the other chick flicks if you sit & watch some porn with him!!!
Someone explain this to me please. Better yet.... grab some red wine, come over to my house, kick off your shoes, climb into bed with me & read 50 Shades Of Gray to me!!!!

Monday, June 11, 2012

TWO YEARS LATER, HINDSIGHT IS 20/20

Barbara Ward-Finneran
I'm over it.  Over the worrying and wondering.  It never seems to go away.  It is a curse of the "mature" midlife adult.  It serves no purpose and yet at times it's practically impossible to dismiss. Practice being "Ms. Pollyanna Positive" all you want - (and I'm good at that!) - but it sneaks in.  It might not even be in the forefront.  Yet it dwells within you.  My "worry monster" usually rears it's ugly head if I wake up during the night.  My brain turns on with thoughts streaming though it worse then a gigantic meteor shower and not nearly as pretty.  In fact it can be pretty ugly and becoming worse.  Much like that buzzing in your ears, after a great concert or all night-er at a loud club way back when, that you can't turn it off.  


It is said that more then 90% of what you worry about never happens.  Human nature though, seems to refuse to let us rationalize that more often then not.  Especially at times more practically used for other things like sleeping.  Our worries transpose but they never seem to disappear.  It's the kids, ailing parents, relationships, obligations, professional issues, finances, job cuts, personal health concerns or scares, etc. etc. etc... The list goes on and on.  Most times it can be shaken off.   At others, not so much.  Those curve balls that life throws you seem to be ready to knock you square between they eyes and you can hardly muster the agility to duck.  Yet life goes on.  Changes. Morphs into the next great chapter.  Complete with it's own set of worries.  And joys!  Let's focus there. Embrace the good and blessings that abound.  Attitude is everything.  It's the difference between feeling like you are lost in the dark and realizing that if it wasn't for the darkness one could never appreciate the beauty of the stars.  


"Sometimes the best thing you can do is not think, not wonder, not imagine, not obsess.  Just breathe and have faith that everything will work out for the best." - Author Unknown


Kind of sums up a few of my "Barbara-isms":
Breathe, just breath!
Change and faith are the only constants.
Keep the promises that you make to yourself!
The best is yet to come!


Here's something I wrote from a while back.  An ironic and beautiful example of how the more things change, the more they stay the same - only different.  LOL 
Hakuna matata my friends, hakuna matata! XO


* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
The power of Perspective
(Author's Note: Written February 2010) 
A few mornings ago I hugged my boys goodbye, jetted out the door, and out of their sight exhaled with a heavy heart.  Wondering if this would be the last "normal" goodbye for a while.  Was it possible that the events forthcoming that morning could change my perspective of everything? Would my whole world feel different in a few hours? The thundering silence of my racing thoughts broken by the sound of my tears as I rushed to the appointment.
Sometimes despite our best efforts there is irony.  Almost a year ago, I looked forty in the eye and decided to make changes.  I adapted a healthier and more active lifestyle. Rededicated myself to and reinvented the girl who felt so alive when chasing my dreams.  In recent months I have looked and felt better then I have in years, yet in the last five weeks I have spent more time with doctors and undergone more tests then I can count on two hands.  
When summoned to the doctor's office for an immediate visit after numerous tests, there isn't any kind of warm fuzzy.  The phone call struck a cord in me that stole the air out of my lungs.  Welcome to another side effect of midlife - health scares.
It is difficult to muster the courage needed to channel your inner strength and to focus on the positive while sitting on a table, dressed in glorified paper towels, and waiting to sink your feet into stirrups while shivering.  Then concentrate on the discussion of tumors, surgical procedures and options while feeling completely vulnerable and still dressed in the fashionless paper gown.  Finally clothed, I sat with a tourniquet on my arm and watched the clear vial fill with the scarlet liquid that eventually may answer the cancer question. 
Sometimes life throws you a curve ball.  Worry is wasted energy!  It does not prevent the sorrows or fears of tomorrow, but steals today's strength and joys.  I'm choosing another route! Being empowered by pinpointing the positive and putting it in a prayerful place.  Cast aside your worries - join me there!