WHEN I HEAR WHAT'S SHAKIN' I THINK...
So Thursday's theme is "What's Shakin." What's shakin is my penis!!!
This piece could've been saved for a "He Said She Said" piece but Delayed Reaction asked "What's Shakin" so here goes.
Men shake their penises after peeing. Since the invention of the toilet bowl women have been carrying on about urine on the seat. Please ladies... chime in here & tell me what the problem is. If a guy pees on the seat what is so hard about wiping it off real quick? If a girl finds pee on the seat what is so hard about wiping it off real quick? Is this really worthy of a centuries long argument?
Personally, I never understand why a guy can't lift the seat up.
When I do have to sit I don't wanna sit on a pee stained seat either! Luckily I've taught my 10 year old punk.... I mean son.... to lift the seat too, which he does. But the problem does not end there. My boy inherited his father's shortcomings if you know what I mean so it's not like he's trying to control a big fire hose... but he can't seem to control it or aim it. He pees all over the toilet, on the floor, the sink, the windows, etc. OK I am kidding about the sink & the windows. But he pees all over the place. I understand my wife's frustration... I don't like stepping in a pee puddle either. But when she finds the smallest drop on the toilet bowl (the area under the seat) she still gets pissed! (Pun intended) If I should have a momentary lapse of control or if I am peeing standing up without my prosthetic leg (I sometime lose my balance. Someone should YouTube the sight of this one legged man losing his balance while holding his junk) some pee gets on the toilet. Honestly ladies I do my best to wipe it all up. But my wife still freaks at the smallest drop! It's not like I left that drop there on purpose! It's not like Barack Obama came to the house & saw a pee stained toilet! It's not like pictures of our toilet is all over the internet! Please ladies.... post your comments here & tell me what exactly is the problem.
The other thing I think about when I hear "What's Shakin" also involves my.... never mind. That's a different blog. Maybe even a completely different web site!